I’ve been struggling for the past few days on if I wanted to share this information but I feel like I should. Last week I had a dream (as many of you know from my facebook post.) It wasn’t just any ordinary crazy dream like I usually have it was much different. I dreamt that I talked to every person I’ve ever known who has died. I wouldn’t have found this dream so unusual if it had been one person or something like that because I’ve had that happen before. This dream they were all in a big room standing around having conversations waiting for me to come up and converse with them. The room looked like an old funeral parlor, which was pretty creepy. When I went up and talked to everyone though it was like they had been alive all along, like I had never “lost” them. I woke up confused. I know that these people aren’t around anymore so why did I dream of them?
I have dealt with the loose of family, friends, and people I barely knew, throughout life. Some people were very young, some old, some deaths were an accident some of natural causes and some subsides. It’s never easy to let a person go no matter who they are. I think the hardest part is being left behind. If you think about it the person who is gone might not even realize they are gone. There are different philosophies on what happens after you die and I truly believe that there is something more after this life. Whether you agree with me or not is your choice, I just know how I feel. There is nothing really to explain what happens, you hear stories of people seeing a white light and things like that but what really happens? I guess we will find out eventually.
One of my biggest points in sharing this is not to rush it. There has been an escalating amount of suicides in the past few months and it stings me deeply. I hate seeing people give up. The main question is why they give up anyways. Is it a comical imbalance in their brain that makes them believe the only way to end what they are going through is to end it all? What if everyone was a little more kind to each other, would that solve all our problems? Sadly I don’t think that would happen nor do I think it would wipe out the problem. The thing that strikes me about suicides is that a lot of people who are committing this act or attempting to think that this is how they will get the rest of the world back for what they’ve or we’ve done to them. That’s terrible. If a person wants revenge that badly that they would take their own life to cause someone else pain, what is this world coming too?
In talking about death you also have to take into consideration the people that are left behind. What happens to them? Now this is where the God thing gets pretty heavy for me. I think God has a plan for everyone but He also gave us the freedom of choice so sometimes we take off from our given path to explore “other things.” I think through that time God tosses out bread crumbs to us to try and direct us back to where he wants us to go. I think God understands that we may not always choice the “right” path so he makes back up plans. I do believe that God has selected us the perfect mate that we can share the rest of our lives with; someone who will understand who we are and how God helped form us. Sometimes that person may have taken the wrong path and gets lost or perhaps isn’t even in this life anymore. Stupid freedom of choice, right? I think that’s were Gods back up plan comes in. God wants us all to be happy, we are his children. He would never want us to be alone just because someone else made the wrong decision. There’s someone out there for everyone, not matter what choices we make.
Loosing someone you care about is hard enough. Seeing other people suffer from the loose can be even more difficult. My wish is that we can all learn from our own experiences and be kind to each other. It might make our time here just a little better. Now wouldn’t that be the best thing ever?